"All that I am or ever hope to be, I owe to my angel Mother." - Abraham Lincoln
As a mum of three children, the best advice I have for you to be the best mum you can be is:
1. Look after yourself.
Take care of yourself. From the minute our beautiful little ones are born, we mums give and give and forget to give to ourselves. It doesn’t have to be much, but maybe a bath at the end of a busy day, taking time to go for a walk, do a workout, or practice relaxing yoga. Maybe a date night with your partner, or having a coffee with a girlfriend, these can all do wonders for a busy mum. Taking care of yourself and making self-care a priority is not a luxury – it is a necessity. If you want to be able to care for others you need to care for yourself. So plan to take care of YOU, make the time. Go On…
2. Listen
Here's a scenario that happens in my house sometimes when I am writing; I’m deep in thought, and the words are flowing onto the page. Then I hear Mum, Mum, Mum… I have to tell you…… or show you….. My daughter wants to tell me or show me something she finds exciting right NOW. I’m busy, so I sometimes say, just let me finish this thought and I will be with you, she goes away to play and I continue writing, time stretches on… and the moment is forgotten.
I started thinking about this and I realised that those times when your child wants to talk and be with you go sooooo fast. I decided to look at it differently, rather than as an interruption, I looked at it as the opportunity to connect with my child.
I decided it’s the Universe telling me to stop and take the time with her. The next time I was writing and my daughter called me, I stopped and went out for a walk and a chat with her.
Now we have an almost daily ¾ hour walk time, where we are arm in arm and chat about her day and what is important in her world. I love this time. She is 10, who knows how long she will want to do this for? She smiles and chats away, (my daughter loves to talk J) and says to me she loves our walk time together.
Funnily enough, I found that when I returned to my writing, I instantly saw ways to improve it. The break gave me a new perspective.
Instead of fighting against the Universe’s requests, instead go with the flow and look for a lesson to be learned. Take time to stop and listen to your child, those times are precious and become more so as they get older.
3. Forgive Yourself
No ones perfect. Don’t try to be the perfect mum, with the perfect hair and make-up, immaculate clothes, slim; as you dropped the baby weight in 4 weeks, with the spotless house, the perfect breastfeed baby who sleeps through the night at 6 weeks. (Do these mums exist?) Do the best you can, you are probably sleep-deprived, have no time to shower, do your hair or get the washing done some days. Just do what you can, schedule in some exercise, as it will make you feel better, but if that doesn’t work that day, try tomorrow, or get out for a quick walk for some fresh air. Don’t beat yourself up, remember you are the fabulous mum of a lucky wee man or little lady.
Do these 3 things and you will be the best mum ever!
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